Oh, the irony of it all!

When Mike and I first got married I was quite insistent that we wouldn't even start trying to get pregnant for the first year; I wanted time to develop our relationship and enjoy some time as just the two of us. However, I prayed alot about our family planning and, after four months, felt strongly that we would have problems and it would be best to get started soon. So, following that impression I went off the birth control. In the subsequent 2 yrs I had 3 miscarriages, numerous fertility treatments and drugs, and we spent alot of money. The upside was, my headaches and migraines were finally properly diagnosed and effective medication was prescribed.

It took 2 1/2 yrs, but we were finally blessed with a wonderful son, Andrew. Expecting the next child to be just as difficult, we never prevented anything and still required a surgery, multiple treatments and drugs, lots of money, and 2+ yrs. But, eventually, Rachael was conceived and born.

We now felt like we had the routine down and knew how to prevent the miscarriages (2 injections of heparin per day) and we just needed patience as we tried for the 3rd child. Lizzie's conception was quite a surprise, but not entirely unexpected. She was born 2yr and 5days after Rachael.

After Lizzie, we felt like we needed a break. I didn't want to leave anything up to chance, so I got on birth control. Andrew and Rachael are both "high-spirited" and require alot of energy. Lizzie, thankfully, is quite mild and happy. She was the break I needed, and an answer to my prayers. I decided that, maybe, sometime in the distant future I could possibly handle a 4th child, maybe.

So... can you guess the irony? Yup, 3mo after Lizzie was born I got pregnant while on birth control. I didn't know it for 7wks and was so tired without knowing why that I empathized with all the parents who call it quits with 3 kids. I took a pregnancy test just to prove to myself that the exhaustion was more mental than physical. I was so convinced that the test was negative that I almost threw it away without confirming the results.

Anyway, I always said I would be most happy with lots of boys and no girls. So.... I just found out today that I am having a 3rd girl. Oh, the irony. Heavenly Father sure loves to laugh and play jokes!

The due date? Well, Lizzie was born on March 4, 2009. This child will be born no later than March 3, 2010. I have to be induced because I have extremely precipitous labors and because I have to be on blood thinners which need to be stopped 24hrs before delivery or I could have bleeding issues. So... I have gone from one extreme to the other - first unable to have a child, now unable to prevent the next child from coming. Oh, the irony of it all.

Crawling

Lizzie turned 7mo on Sept 4. She is so different from Andrew or Rachael. One main difference is how very big she is - she's wearing 12mo clothes that Rachael wasn't wearing until she was 15mo. Today was momentous, though, because she took her first tentative crawling steps. She's been close for at least a week, but it finally happened today. YEAH!! She is so proud of herself - let the adventure begin!

Birthdays

For the past month, at least, Andrew has been asking some variation about when his birthday is: "Is today my birthday?", "Is it my birthday tomorrow after I wake up?", "How many days before my birthday?", etc. He keeps singing the Happy Birthday song to anything - me, his toys, his food, the pens, whatever.

Today he asked, "Mom, is today my birthday?"
"No, Andrew, I'm sorry."
"What about tomorrow after I wake up? Is it my birthday tomorrow after I wake up?"
"No, Andrew. Tomorrow after you wake up is just Sunday, not your birthday."
"How many tomorrow-after-I-wake-ups until my birthday."
"About 100"
"But, you always say that!"
"Andrew, I'm sorry, but it's exactly 4 months until your birthday - that is 123 days."
"123 days? but what about tomorrow after I wake up?"
"Nope, I'm sorry. You have to wait for 123 tomorrow-after-you-wake-ups for it to be your birthday."
"But I don't want to wait that long.... How about we make today your birthday and then it can be my birthday tomorrow after I wake up?"
"Hehehe, I'm sorry Andrew. It just doesn't work that way. You're just going to have to wait."
"But... I can't take it anymore!"

Insect Salad

Andrew doesn't like to try eating new things, so the other day we pulled a note from the comic Calvin & Hobbes. We had Insect Salad. For the adventurous, you should try it.

Spider Legs stir-fried in Slug Slime
Crushed Grasshoppers
Ground-up Bug Brains

douse it in Snake Blood
top with Beetle Backs

Andrew thought it was very silly, but was willing to try it and found that he liked it. For those of you who are less adventurous, here're the non-insect ingredients, respectively.

Ramen noodles crushed and stir-fried in butter
Shredded Green Cabbage
Ground-up Chicken

douse in: 1/4cp vinegar, 1/4cp water, 1/4cp oil, 1/2cp sugar, 1T soy sauce
top with Sliced Almonds

Thanks, Patricia, for the original recipe. It is one of our favorite summer foods.

Our Garden

I am very proud of our garden this year. We are doing Square Foot Gardens, again. Our first attempt was last year and we had a great harvest of tomatoes, but the other stuff didn't do so well. So, this year we have planted earlier, and I did a whole box devoted to strawberries - yummy! :) Today, I picked the first ripe strawberry and we all shared it by taking small bites. It was super yummy - WAY better than what you get at the store. Here are some pics.

This was the first ripe strawberry, a few days before harvest.



You see tomatoes in the back, then some onions going out of control. You can't see them, but in the back are some green bean plants. There are also marigolds, okra, and carrots. The front row is 3 squares of potatoes and the built-up box is for long carrots that wouldn't work with only 6in of soil.



Here, more tomatoes and onions going crazy. We have a different variety of carrots and also some green bell pepper plants. There is a square of okra and some peas - we can't seem to get peas to grow well, though. We also have some cucumber plants, in the back.



Here are more tomatoes (we like tomatoes), carrots, onions, chili and bell peppers, beets, peas, and the big one is a pumpkin - its leaves are huge.

I didn't know the leaves got that big. They are even bigger now, since taking the picture.

We also have a watermelon growing in a bucket. We didn't know what it was, but it didn't look like a weed, so Mike put it in a bucket for future identification. Now we need to figure out what to do with it since it will definitely outgrow the bucket.

We've had fun with the garden and are looking forward to the harvest. Mike introduced me to beet-greens. The texture was slimy, just as bad as spinach. If you put enough salt and butter, though, it is possible to force them down your throat chased with a large glass of water - I'm not a fan, could you tell?

The kids enjoy helping us water and admire, and haven't picked anything - yet.

Never Suppress a Generous Thought

It was Camilla Kimball who offered that sage advice: never suppress a generous thought. I try to remember that whenever I want to be helpful, but feel awkward offering. I have tried to teach my kids to be kind and thoughtful of others.

Andrew's best friend, Marcus, went on vacation for 3 wks at the beginning of the summer - they were a long 3 wks for Andrew. At one point, Andrew colored a "pretty picture for my best friend, Marcus" and wanted to give it to him. I told him that we could mail it and that it would be waiting for Marcus at his house when he returned. Andrew liked that idea. A few weeks later, we were talking about all he had learned in preschool and he said he wanted to "draw a pretty picture for my teacher, Miss Rebecca." It just so happened that I had an errand to run in that area, so we hand-delivered the picture. She wasn't there, so Andrew wrote her name on it and we discussed how excited she would be to come to work and get it. He has now made multiple pictures for various people in his life and he loves putting the stamp on the envelope and putting it out in the mail. We always discuss how excited the recipient will be and how they will feel so special to get a pretty picture in the mail.

So, the other day we were out working in the garden and Andrew and Rachael were entertaining themselves. I turned around and saw all the tennis balls were carefully placed throughout the yard. They seemed too precisely placed for it to be an accident, so I asked Andrew what they were.
He informed me that he was the mailman and he was busy delivering special packages to every house. He then pulled out his check-list and went through it to make sure that no one had been forgotten (it's a scrap of wood - sorry, the picture isn't very good) .What a sweet, caring boy!

So, Who's Winning?

Rachael is a very smart, and very strong-willed little girl. Once she gets an idea in her head, that is the end of the discussion nothing will distract her. The past few days have really demonstrated this for me.

If some dishes fall on the floor, she is determined to "help clean up" by putting them away. If I take them away because they are dirty, a tantrum ensues. Once she has decided she wants something, be it candy or a certain toy, that is the end of the story. No distraction technique or offering a choice of alternatives will satisfy her - either she gets exactly what she wants or she will throw a tantrum. Bed time is the worst. She loves the routine of reading stories, singing songs and saying prayers. But, when it's time to actually go to bed, it's a tantrum.

So, who's winning the proverbial parent/child struggle? It depends on how you keep score. Her initial response to me is, "no thanks, mommy", the tantrum comes after I have exerted my authority. But, hey, at least I've taught her to be polite in her disobedience, that has to count for something... right?

The Power of Prayer

Many years ago I read an article in the Ensign that has stuck with me. I would like to share it with anyone reading this.

A relatively young lady moved into a new ward with her husband and young child. She was quickly given her Visiting Teaching assignments. One of the ladies she was responsible for was an elderly woman. She went to her first appointment with some trepidation, not knowing what she could possibly teach this lady who had so much life experience under her belt. They quickly became friends and she was amazed at how active and busy this woman was always serving those around her. A couple years passed and suddenly this elderly woman had a stroke. She survived but it left her completely paralyzed. The young Visiting Teacher had no idea what to say to her, but she went to visit with a desire to do something helpful. She prepared herself to find the woman quite unhappy and depressed because she had previously been so active.

She showed up and the elderly woman was all smiles and just as happy as normal. The young VT was quite confused and finally had to ask how she could possibly be so happy. The wise woman responded, "Oh, I was always so busy with another batch of cookies to make or something, but now I have time to really help people. I can pray for them, and I know the Lord hears my prayers."

What a great lesson! If you know the Fogelquists, please pray for them. Their son Monte is really having a difficult time with all his health challenges and they need guidance and peace. My first instinct would be to make them a meal. However, they are many states away now. But, I can pray for them, and I, too, know the Lord hears my prayers.

The Ambitions Sour Cream

I assume Rachael is a typical child who needs equal amounts of play time and eating time at the dinner table. We do not allow toys at the table so she has to be creative. Since Rachael has never been inhibited by the intended uses of something, this has never been a problem.

Tonight we had tacos for dinner, including sour cream. Here is a list of all the uses Rachael found for this humble, unassuming condiment.
1. make it the main (and only) course
2. a bathtub for her tomatoes
3. a bed for the tomato seeds to sleep in
4. daubed on a spoon to use as a weapon against mom (poison-tipped spear?)
5. slime to fling from her spoon and hands
6. mud to squeeze through her fingers
7. make-up to smear on her face
8. while she was at it, might as well make it a whole face mask
9. paint to rub all over her arms
10. medicine to put on her owies

All this occurred in less than 15 mins. And I might add, much of these came from Rachael's own lips when we asked, "Rachael, what are you doing? Can't you just eat?"
And finally,
11. make-up, paint, mud, or anything else to smear on mommy as she tried to get Rachael clean.

Who knew sour cream could be so versatile?

Just Try It

Andrew is about the pickiest, most finicky eater ever. By the time he was 2, he had us trained to cheer and congratulate him for eating even a cookie or some ice cream. A little progress has been made since then, mainly due to friends and peer pressure.

We got a book from the library about a kid who refused to eat his vegetables - even try them. It's called, "Just Try It". We had read it a few times and discussed how trying new things is good and you often find new foods that you like, when one night for dinner I made something that Andrew refused to try (no surprise). So, I asked him what he was willing to eat. He said, "you tell me". This is when I get to start naming things off in hopes of him saying yes to something. The difficulty is that if you name too many things that he doesn't want to eat, he gets upset and then the whole idea of eating is out the window.

Anyway, I mentioned a waffle (frozen) and he said yes. I asked if he wanted jam and he said grape, then he said he wanted ketchup. "What? You want ketchup instead of grape jam?" I asked.
"No," he said. "I want grape jam and ketchup on the side."
"Ooh." I said, trying to sound enthusiastic and hoping I, at least, didn't sound too disgusted.
So, I served it to him. I cut the waffle and poured some ketchup on the side of the plate, expecting that I was just wasting a bunch of ketchup.

Nope, Andrew dipped every bite of his grape jam waffle into the ketchup and ate the entire thing. To top it off, he wanted another one the next day, but this time with strawberry jam. I asked him if it tasted good and he said, "Just try it, mommy. It's good, you'll like it." Thankfully, I used the allergy-diet for Lizzie as my excuse to get out of trying it. But, I did get to eat my own words - they sure were tasty!

The newborn 5 stage grief cycle

The 5 stage grief cycle describes the emotions that people feel when a loved one has died. Well, I am here to say that it applies to the beginning of life as well as the end.

1. Denial
When a baby is born, he sleeps most of the time and is just a joy to hold. The parents wonder, "why do people say this is hard? Others must not have prepared like we did." They are in sweet denial of the reality to come.

2. Anger
At some point, usually 2wks for me, the little bundle of joy begins to realize he is no longer in the womb and doesn't want to sleep anymore. This precious newborn begins to cry for no obvious reason and all the parents' preparations go out the window. They begin to feel angry at the parenting books with their fool-proof solutions. They begin feeling angry at those around them for breathing too loudly and waking the baby. They finally settle on being angry at the unseen alien who came and replaced their perfect darling with a crying, screaming child.

3. Bargaining
Eventually, the parents become putty in this innocent child's hands. They forget all their pre-determined rules like "getting on a schedule", "no children in our bed", or "my child won't use a pacifier". Instead, the parents break down and start begging and promising anything if the child would just calm down long enough for mom to get a shower.

4. Depression
By now, the baby is around 2 1/2mo old. The parents are too exhausted to be angry and their creativity for bargaining has been completely tapped out. They fall into a funk and realize that they will never be perfect parents and begin to question their own sanity and why they ever thought that having a child was preferable over having a dog. They feel even more depressed as they realize that their own parents aren't so incomprehensible anymore.

5. Acceptance
After our poor parents have been depressed, they are humbled enough to accept reality. No, they will never get enough sleep again. They begin to understand why their own parents did certain bizarre things and they accept that the real ruler of the house is this tiny infant that they so eagerly anticipated.

Our pure and innocent child's sovereignty has now been established and his parents' unconditional submission is assured. His 3 months of hard work has paid off for himself and for the good of all future siblings. He can now relax and get on a schedule, knowing full well that his parents are in the palm of his hand.

Well, that one back-fired!

Lately, I have allowed Andrew to watch certain educational TV shows. They center around learning to read or learning good values. However, there is one thing he has learned that I am not pleased with.

One of the commercials that comes on often stars a certain "SmokerMan" and the theme song goes, "SmokerMan is the one who caaaaaannnnnnn't". The commercial shows smokerman in some super-hero scenario where he can't quite make the save because he wasn't able to breathe. It seems like a good concept to show kids that you lose your abilities if you smoke. Unfortunately, all Andrew is getting from the commercial is that SmokerMan is a cool super-hero.

It seems rather ironic that I am having to teach my 4yr old that smoking is bad all because he saw an anti-smoking commercial.

Ode to Lizzie

When I discovered that I was pregnant with Lizzie, I was, of course, overjoyed but apprehensive. Would she be just as difficult, high-strung, and exhausting as Andrew and Rachael? Would she have food allergies like them? Would this be our last child? That question would be determined by the answers to the first questions.

Well, apparently Heavenly Father wants us to have more children because the only "yes" answer is in relation to the food allergies. Lizzie's allergies are just as severe as Andrew's were, but this time we were prepared and caught them at 2 1/2 wks. In all other ways, she is quite different from our first 2; she sleeps alot, is growing very quickly, and is a happy, calm baby.

When she is awake, she is very alert and loves to look around and be outside. Today she started cooing. It was so cute - she cooed while looking at me and was surprised to realize that she had made that sound. Her expression was so cute. She tried it again then smiled at her new-found ability. I smiled along with her.

Andrew and Rachael have also learned that they can make her laugh and they love to do silly things in an effort to get her response. They love her (yes, Rachael has finally accepted her) and it is heart-warming to see them interact.

All in all, I am so grateful for our latest bundle of joy and that my begging prayers for a calm baby were answered. Now, if I could just find some safe food to eat.... :)

My Mother's Day

I have been plagued by migraines since I was 6yrs old. At their worst, I was getting about 2/wk with a constant chronic headache anytime I was awake. We finally figured out what was wrong and since I've been on medication, I get them rarely. However, certain things will still set them off.

Mother's day for me started out very calm and relaxing - just as it should be. Mike helped get the kids dressed for church as I lolly-gagged all morning. Church was enjoyable, until it came to nurse Lizzie. Our church building is kinda old and the mother's room is rather small with a very high ceiling. There is a fluorescent light at the top and a ceiling fan under the light. They are controlled by the same switch. This wreaked havoc with me as the fan turning causes a slight strobe-light-like effect. Strobe lights give me nausea and migraines. I tried to just keep my eyes shut while I was nursing, but the strobe-throbbing was too intense and by the time I left the mother's room I was quite sick and desperate to get home. I made it through the last hour of church (Mike and I are Primary teachers together).

This is where the true gift of Mother's day came for me. I slept for 4hrs, Mike took care of everything. I woke up, still feeling sick and with a migraine. Mike made a fabulous steak dinner for me (I was hoping some iron/protein would help) and did all the clean-up. I crashed back in bed, still completely debilitated. By now my vision was mostly gone as well as my speech and I was just trying not to throw-up.

The kids were quiet, knowing that "mommy has a headache" and Mike got them to bed and the house picked-up (no small feat). I finally had to take some drugs around midnight. The whole time, Mike was nothing but loving and concerned.

It is quite humbling to be debilitated by such a small thing as a fan set under a light. What a blessing to have a husband who can take care of everything when my body fails me!

It wasn't exactly a typical "perfect" mother's day, but it reminded me how truly blessed I am.

Money by Andrew

Andrew and I had an enlightening conversation about money today. I grew up being told that "money doesn't grow on trees." Well, Andrew has his own version. For ease of writing, M is for mom and A is for Andrew.

A: "Mom, we need to get more money to go for tumbling and swimming"
M: "umm, ok" chuckle, chuckle
A: "Why is that funny, mommy?"
M: "Because, Andrew, it is hard to get more money."
A: "Oh, well, we just need to go to the money store."
M: "What money store? There is no money store."
A: "They just have to take down the old building and build a new building for the money store."
M: "And does the money store give you money or take your money"
A: "They give you money."
M: "Oh, where do they get the money that they give you?"
A: "They sell it to you."
M: "They sell you money? What do you give them for the money?"
A: "You give them your old money and they give you the new money."
M: "Oh.... ok."
A: "Then we can have lots of money to go tumbling and swimming."

Ahh, if it were truly that simple!

But, my tongue's not long enough!

My sister, Kim, often comes down from Salt Lake to play with the kids and make sure her status of "favorite Auntie" is secure.

So, Kim came down for the weekend, and Mike and I went on a date. Andrew is potty-trained, but still uses a diaper for bed. He was laying down on the changing pad and she said, "Lift your bum up so I can put your diaper on." Andrew sits bolt up-right and says, "But, I can't lick my bum! My tongue's not long enough!"

Mommy, you made a mistake!

Andrew's preschool works on a different letter of the alphabet each week. The letter of the week is introduced on Monday and on Friday he gets to take a show-and-tell item starting with that letter to end the week of learning. I try to find multiple items for each letter and let him choose what he wants to bring.

This past week was the letter W. Friday came quickly for me and I had only thought of: water, wheel, and worm. He has a cute caterpillar, named Cally, that he had been playing with all week, so I suggested he take the caterpillar for show-and-tell. When I picked him up from school, he looked at me with a very concerned look and said, "Mommy, you made a mistake! Cally is NOT a worm, she's a caterpillar. See, she has all these feetsies. Worms don't have feetsies. See, mommy, Cally has feetsies, she's not a worm, she's a caterpillar!" He continued explaining to me until I admitted that I was wrong and that Cally was not, in fact, a worm.

3 for 3

Too bad i'm not talking about my batting avg. Instead I am referring to my babies with allergies. That's right, Lizzie has food allergies just like the others. I am concerned that hers are as severe as Andrew's - she's having symptoms like his. I am hoping that catching it this early will prevent them from getting worse. So...

I am now soliciting (begging) for recipe ideas that don't require: dairy, soy, egg, or peanut. I am especially in need of dinner ideas. I can substitute some things in recipes, but if you have to substitute more than 2 ingredients then it no longer resembles the original item. I have yet to find a good substitute for cheese, sour cream, or cream cheese - and almond cheese has a dairy protein (casein) in it, so no good.

Please help if you can. Thanks :)

A nose lid?

Anyone familiar with Andrew knows that he gags (and throws up) very easily. Lately, strong bad smells have caused him to start gagging.

The other day, we left the house for school and Andrew said that it was stinky outside. Apparently the stinky followed us into the car because Andrew asked me for a "nose lid."

"What do you want, Andrew?"
"Mommy, I need a nose lid."
"Why do you need a nose lid?"
"To protect me from the stinky," he said as if this was obvious.
"What?"
"Mommy!" Andrew said exasperatedly, "I need a nose lid to protect me from the stinky smell!"
"Oh, ok. Well, we don't have a nose lid."
"Ooohh. We can go to the nose store to buy a nose lid."
"The nose store?"
"Yeah, the nose store. That's where you buy a nose lid."
"Oh, well... I don't know where the nose store is."
"That's ok, mommy. I tell how to get there. First, you go on the turny bridge (the North on-ramp) vroom, vroom, vroom and then drive next to railroad tracks for a long time and then turn corners and you are there."
"Really? Those are good directions. Maybe we should just get you a new nose."
"No! mommy, you're being silly. I can't get a new nose. I need a nose lid to protect me from the stinky smells."

We decided we would talk about it again after school. Luckily, he forgot about it by the time I picked him up.

It's a girl!

Elizabeth Sue Martineau
March 4, 2009 @ 6:42pm
7lbs 9oz, 19.5 inches
all is well

i just sent an email with photos to everyone that i have email addresses for. if you didn't get the email, please contact me at: sendtobeckym@hotmail.com
i'll forward the email to you and update my address book.

How to Really Scare Daddy

Mike's father has been having various medical problems and has been staying with us off and on in order to be close to his doctors. He has passed out a few times and this has scared us all.

The other day, Andrew wanted to watch a movie in the living room. Mike was working downstairs and Grandpa was asleep on the couch. I was gone with Rachael and Grandma was gone, too. So, Andrew went to Mike carrying some headphones and said, "Daddy, I want to watch a movie and I can't wake up Grandpa." Mike rushed upstairs to find his father on the couch looking pale with his head back. His mouth was partially open and he was very still. Mike's fear gripped him and he ran to his father shaking him and yelling, "Dad, Dad!" Grandpa opened his eyes and said, "What?! I was having a good nap!"

Apparently, Andrew was asking daddy for help plugging the headphones in to the DVD player so that he wouldn't wake up grandpa.

Sneaky Boy!

Lately, Andrew has decided that he is, "not silly, I'm funny" or he wants to "trick" us with whatever. Like, saying prayers - he wants us to start saying the prayer and at some time he'll jump in and start repeating us and, afterwards, say he "tricked us." So, I guess that means he is developing his sense of humor, though he hasn't figured out that an important element of "tricking" is surprise. He generally forewarns us to make sure we play the game correctly.

So, a few days ago, I was playing blocks with them and we were building towers "high to the ceiling." We have a set of 50 letter blocks that stack nicely. Rachael wanted to build then destroy. I divided the blocks up evenly, but Andrew felt he needed more blocks to get his tower higher. He swiped a few of Rachael's blocks without her noticing and his success gave him brilliant ideas. Every time she made a tower of 10 or so blocks she would knock it down. Sometimes, the blocks would roll behind her. Andrew was like a lion on the prowl. He would slowly and quietly inch behind Rachael waiting for her to knock a block behind her. Immediately he would pounce on the block and hide it behind his back. If she happened to look behind her, he would keep the block nonchalantly hidden as he innocently walked back to his tower to add another piece that he just "happened" to find.

I was so torn between laughing at Andrew's "sneaky" behavior and defending Rachael's blocks. I just sat and observed until Rachael was down to only 12 blocks and started noticing that they were disappearing. She finally caught Andrew in the act and started squawking her outrage. Andrew knew he was in the wrong. He tried to be pouty, but Rachael's scandalized protests won out and I told Andrew he had to stop sneaking her blocks. Once he realized that I had been watching him, he got the most classic look of "I've been caught" on his face. It then changed to a mix of "Aren't I clever?" and "Am I in trouble?" I had to choke back my laughter and tell him to just play with the blocks that he had and stop taking Rachael's.

Musical Beds

Yesterday's post discussed some of the difficulties in getting the kids to sleep. Getting them to stay asleep is a whole other problem. As Andrew is getting older, he's getting better. But, we've had many, many long nights with him. Now it's Rachael's turn to wake in the middle of the night and refuse to go back to sleep. They share a room and are both still sleeping in a crib. Andrew's railing is down so that he has easy access into and out, but Rachael has yet to earn her freedom. The normal middle-of-the-night solution for either is to bring their crib mattress into our room and let him/her sleep on the floor next to us.

So, last Sunday night Mike and I were not feeling well. Andrew went to sleep in his bed and Rachael fell asleep in the high chair. Mike moved her to her bed once we went to sleep. Around 3am, Andrew started sobbing. I asked Mike to go check on him. His solution was to bring Andrew into bed with us. Andrew fell back asleep and so did we. Around 5am, Rachael started screaming. Well, I was too tired to pull the mattress out, so I just brought her in to bed with us. One happy family snuggling in a queen size bed together - right!

Mike was sleeping in the middle of the bed, Andrew taking half my pillow and Rachael insisted on sleeping horizontally. There was no room for mommy in the bed. So, being exhausted, I tried to fall asleep on the couch, but the sun was too bright. The kids' room has blankets over the windows, so I went and climbed in to Andrew's crib, curled up and went to sleep. Predictably, my knees started cramping. So, I put Andrew's mattress on the floor and tried again. I finally gave up around 6:30am.

Mercifully, my sister came on Monday to play with the kids and I spent most of the day in bed - my own bed. How much of that exhaustion was due to illness and how much was due to my nighttime game of musical bed? - I'll never know.

Who knew a high chair could be so versatile?

Sleeping has never been something easy for my kids. There have been very short phases when it hasn't been a struggle, but those times are short-lived and not the rule. Most advice is to "show them you are in charge and let them just scream it out. They'll eventually give up and go to sleep." Well, after allowing them to scream for 2-3 hours, I normally decide that they are not going to give up. It's not that they aren't tired, normally it is when they are very tired and, therefore, very wound up and have been denied some little thing they want.

So, the month of January gave me a short reprieve from the constant sleep battle. Andrew has continued to be rather easy, but I made all the bottles disappear starting in Feb and Rachael still has not forgiven the betrayal. She enjoys the nightly routine of stories, songs, prayers, and brush teeth. But when it comes time to lay down, she starts screaming. Because Andrew and Rachael share a room, this makes it difficult for Andrew to fall asleep. This has presented quite the dilemma as I know that she won't just give up. So, where do I put her?

A few months before Christmas Rachael decided she was too old to sit in her high chair. She now eats her meals standing up on a normal chair. The high-chair then became an effective time-out chair. Well, when Rachael started throwing a fit at night, I decided to put her in time-out in the high chair. I work on the computer at night, so I put her in the living room facing the front door with the light off. The chair was reclined and I thought she would hate it - hoping she would decide that her bed was better than the high chair. Ha! how wrong I was!

Long story short, the high chair is now her preferred place for falling asleep. I move the high-chair for nap-time into her room and for bed-time into my room. Sometimes she wants to roll over and is willing to be moved to her bed. Often, she sits there and plays with her fingers until she's ready to sleep.

She seems satisfied in the knowledge that, yet again, she has foiled my attempts at coercion. I console myself by saying at least I have stood firm by insisting that it be quiet time and by not putting her down in my bed (I learned that lesson with Andrew).

Beat Me To The Punch

Andrew has preschool on Mon, Wed, and Fri mornings. When I pick him up, I try to always be enthusiastic as I ask him about what he learned and how much fun he had. The school has a “valet” service where you drive behind the school and the teachers bring your child out to your car. You then slowly drive around to the front to park and buckle up.

A few weeks ago, I had a lot on my mind as I waited in line to pick up Andrew. He got in the car and I started driving around to the front. He then piped up and said, “How was your day at school, Mommy?” It caught only half of my attention and my brilliant reply was, “what?” He asked again, “How was your day at school, today, mommy? What letter did you learn?” By now he had my attention and was smiling broadly. I told him he was silly and he proceeded my usual line of questioning all the way home while I got to play his role of describing what letter I learned, words that start with that letter, the songs I sang and what we made in Kitchen that started with that letter. The whole exchange was very funny and clever on his part.

He informed me whenever I was wrong; it’s a good thing I had his papers to peek at while I buckled him in otherwise I would have, “made lots of mistakes.”

Hey, I just did what you told me to do!

A few months ago Rachael taught us that we have to be very specific with the conditions we set for her, because she takes us at our word - literally.

We were eating dinner and Rachael's mouth was stuffed. Unlike her mother or brother, Rachael follows her father's eating philosphy of mixing all the different foods together and eating it combined. She was eating quite well and happily until we brought out a new dish, it was probably jello. The kids aren't allowed to have jello until they have eaten their dinner. So, Mike offered Rachael the jello and said, "ok, you can have some when your mouth is empty." Well, Rachael considered that for a moment then spit out all the food from her mouth into her hand. She offered the masticated mess to Mike with the announcement that she was, "all done. jello."

Well, what could Mike do? Her mouth was empty, as instructed. She got her jello and we got quite the lesson on being specific.

World's #1 Dad

for the past few days mike has been telling andrew that he was making a surprise for him. mike hadn't told me what it was, but yesterday the surprise was delivered. mike drew a detailed map of the inside of our house and turned it into a treasure map then cut it into pieces for andrew to construct the puzzle. i helped him tape the puzzle pieces together then andrew had to orient the map to the house and find the start location. he then followed the arrows throughout the house to find the "X marks the spot" - which was a winter hat with 3 pieces of candy in it. andrew loved his treasure hunt puzzle and, of course, eating his treasure. he had a lot of fun putting the puzzle together and following the arrows; he also did very well by himself with only a few pointers from mom. he wants to play the game again and we will probably make a digital copy of the "map" to make it faster to create next time.

mike watched from the sidelines and enjoyed seeing andrew understand and use the map. after andrew got his candy, mike said, "well, now that i've secured my position of world's #1 dad, i need to get back to work." andrew has a great daddy!

Rachael's Coniving - 1

a few weeks ago, rachael wanted more juice in the morning (no surprise there) and i told her, "no. not until you've eaten some food. do you want some cereal?" the typical power struggle ensued and, eventually, she accepted a bowl of corn chex to eat (dry, of course). i sat her at the table, promised her more juice after she ate the cereal, and went in to the fridge to find something that was smelling. shortly thereafter, she came and asked for more juice. i asked if she was done eating and she said, "yeah." i clarified my question and asked if she had eaten all her cereal. she got upset and walked back to the table. a few minutes later, i was still trying to find the stinky culprit in the fridge, i heard her walking around and saw her just in time to see her dump the cereal into the sink. she put the bowl in the sink and came to me to announce, with arms outstretched, "all done." cute as it was, i suppressed my laughter and went to the sink to retrieve the empty bowl and most of the remaining cereal (luckily, my sink was clean at the time). i put her back at the table and said she had to eat her cereal, all of it, if she wanted more juice. she pouted but went back to the task of eating; i went back to my task of looking for the reeking science experiment in the fridge. a few minutes later, i heard her walking around and looked around the fridge door in time to see her using the small dustpan and handbroom to clean up her spilled cereal off the floor. she swept it as best she could, dumped it in the garbage and brought me her empty bowl and said, "all done. more juice." i had to work hard not to laugh at her machinations and determination to get more juice. i returned to the table, scooped up a few remaining pieces of cereal from floor (luckily it was also relatively clean). this time i sat with her and she ate the retrieved cereal and then i gave her more juice.

the scriptures say children are innocent and without guile.... so, what happened with my kid? if that's not guile, what is? :)

Personality Traits

ok, comment on that last blog. Rachael isn't really swearing, she pronounces milk as "mit" and chocolate as "dam" so, the two combined just sound like she's swearing. mike wanted that clarified.

anyway, rachael and andrew each have very strong personalities, which lend themselves to many humorous stories. one thing that andrew likes to do is give explanations as to how the world works. for example, he likes to explain how "the clouds sit on the mountains and the mountains bake the water to make snow and then the snow falls out of the clouds after it is done baking." if you try to tell him that snow is actually frozen water, not baked, he vehemently tells you, "no, you're making a mistake. the mountains bake the snow in the clouds and that makes the snow fall. you're saying it wrong!"

rachael is much more of a coniver. she will say whatever is necessary to get what she wants. this lands her in time-out alot and i have found myself trying to explain truth and lies to a child who's not even 2. for example, i occasionally sleep in on sat mornings because the busy, exhausting week catches up to me. mike takes care of the kids' immediate needs, then goes downstairs to work, leaving the kids in front of sat morning cartoons. rachael hates this and is always banging on my door asking for more juice. when i ignore her, she reverts to her tactics of finding something more urgent. invariably, she tries a nice fake cry that i ignore then she starts complaining of a poopy diaper. once i'm up to change her diaper, she runs away because she doesn't want a diaper change, nor does she need one. she just wants me up to get her more juice.

i have stories like these almost daily and will try to post them to remember them and give the "mother's curse" to my children. hahaha

My Sweet Little Girl has a Potty Mouth

ok, not really, but it got your attention, didn't it? so, here's the story.
Andrew has always been really good with drinking milk and Rachael won't touch it - she drinks juice all the time. I've been trying to wean her of her juice addiction, but she's very stubborn (must get it from her dad :) ). Lately, Andrew has been on a big "flavored" milk kick; he wants chocolate, strawberry, or vanilla. I can get chocolate milk by the gallon and this is less expensive than the other flavors.

So, the other day, Rachael asked for more juice and I said no. The conversation was something like, "juice" "no" "juice" "no" "juice" "no" etc. I offered her some chocolate milk and, amazingly, she said "yeah." Later that night, she woke up and I couldn't get her calmed down. She was demanding juice and to sleep in bed with us. I said no to both, but she was in our room already at this point. The conversation was, "juice" "no" "juice" "no" "juice" "no" "dammit" "no-what?" "dammit" "huh, what did you say?"

It didn't take long to guess that she was asking for chocolate milk, but it sure got my attention at 2am wondering where she heard potty language - we're very careful about tv/movies. anyway, she now daily asks for "dammit" and i'm happy to give it to her.

getting started

well, i am anything but an "early-adopter" but it is finally time for me to explore and start using various social network and info technologies. i will try to update this often. it is meant solely for extended family and friends to stay up-to-date with our family. one thing that you will NOT see is pictures of the family because i am not comfortable posting pictures of the kids online - mike and i know too much about how easy it is to download a photo and manipulate it. so, if you want photos, email me.